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Ugh, Mom and Dad, no PDA!

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Nick: Call it a “sixth sense,” but I can tell when my kids’ eyes are on Jen and me.  I can practically hear their eyes rolling whenever we touch each other.
When I come home and take a moment to find Jen and embrace her, and I meet one of our kids’ eyes, I’m treated to a facial expression that says “get a room.”  Though I should know better than to let it bother me, I have to admit, it’s still a challenge for me.  I didn’t grow up in a very touchy-feely home, so my knee-jerk reaction to getting the stare from one of our children is to want to jump back from Jen like we’re two kids dancing too close together in junior high when the grown-ups walk by.
Seriously though, what is the alternative?  Everywhere I go, I see couples with kids between them.  Sitting in movie theaters and on their couches at home, mom – kids – dad, sending the message:  kids first and spouse second.  If we let that become the norm, we’re asking for trouble.  We worry about our affection being too uncomfortable, but…
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Criticism -- Constructive Or Not?

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We recently read an article on constructive criticism in marriage.  The bottom line was "don't do it."  Even, "Can I give you some feedback?" was followed by "Beware!"  I was immediately critical of the article.  Those who know me know I don't roll over and play dead, especially when I am passionate about something.  So we came up with 5 Key Points to help avoid triggering a land mine in this sensitive area of relationship.
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How We Saved Our Failing Marriage

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Paul: We just celebrated our 33rd wedding anniversary and we’ve never been happier. But it wasn’t always that way. Around year 7 of our marriage, we began to struggle. And we did what so many married couples do – ignored the warning signs telling ourselves things were not that bad. We swept issues between us under the rug and after another 5 years of sweeping there was no more room under the rug! We were just roommates co-existing in the same household each playing our respective roles.
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Our Ketchup Story

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Janine:  I used to read into everything Ken said - well almost everything.  If he made a simple comment, I often took it as a personal criticism, even though he didn't intend it to be.  We still talk about the day, years ago, when he said, "Gee, we're almost out of ketchup."
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Keeping Up with the Jones's

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Jen: As we approach the craziness of a new school year with our kiddos, I am struck once again by how tempting it is to compete with other parents in comparing kid activities. Even when they were in pre-school, I can remember having conversations about where my kids were developmentally and what their achievements were. I can remember how much angst I felt when I thought someone else’s child was achieving more than mine simply because I hadn’t signed them up for enough extra activities. I found myself doubting that we were doing enough to help our children reach their full potential.


The more I’ve lived through hectic seasons of crazy schedules of classes and practices and recitals and performances, the more I realize how much the craziness takes its toll on our lives as a family and especially in our marriage. Trying to make it so I have the best kid brag-rights may be satisfying in the moment, but it does not reflect our closeness as a family. It doesn’t say anything about the way ou…
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