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Showing posts from February, 2019

Teamwork

We received a request to share on the topic of teamwork.  Good topic!
Every marriage is based in teamwork – we chose our partner to team up with in life.  Like most marriages, we have had times when we pull together in the same direction and times when we are fighting against each other.  Over the years, we have found

The Secret Recipe of Intimacy

In our last post we hinted at the complexity of intimacy, especially in the context of forgiveness and healing (1/13/19).  Intimacy involves more than sex.  In fact sex can sometimes be anything but intimate. Many authors and psychologists speak of at least 4 components to deep and sustained intimacy.  They often include emotional, intellectual, spiritual and physical intimacy.  We like to think of this as the 'Secret Recipe.' To achieve this Intimacy we both need to desire and be willing to work towards intimacy.

Intellectual Intimacy is sharing ideas and thoughts, showing an interest in each other's hobbies.  We won't always enjoy doing the same thing, but we support each other's pursuits and successes.  Tom has always mowed the lawn, but over the years he has joined me in gardening, saving seeds, nurturing seedlings and reading about heirloom tomatoes.  As a result, some of our most memorable conversations and moments have occurred working together in our garden.

Talk to Me

Ken:  When we were dating, it seemed we could talk all night, and sometimes we did.  During our engagement, there was so much to talk and dream about together...our future, a home, kids, jobs, adventures.
Janine:  I remember the 10 hour road trip we took so I could meet Ken's Mom for the first time.  All the way there and back, we talked and talked.  Fast forward about 5 or 6 years though, and I remember sitting in a restaurant, just the two of us, with nothing to say to each other.  Silence. 
Ken:  Do most of your conversations center around the kids or problems at work or the honey-do list?