Skip to main content

3 Steps to a Better Work – Life Balance

Image
By

Let’s face it – being married and raising a family is hard work. Add in demanding work schedules, children’s activities, volunteer work, and making time for family and friends, and it can be overwhelming. Here are three ways we’ve discovered to keep our work-life better balanced.


Learning to Say No
Steph: No matter what stage you find yourself in – newly married, children at home or empty-nesters – finding balance between couple time and life’s demands can be an ongoing challenge. Paul and I thought once our children left home we would have plenty of time to spend together, but the reality was we filled up extra time with new commitments. Volunteer activities and extra projects at work replaced time spent at our kid’s sporting events. Open spots on our calendar quickly filled. We soon realized that our relationship was once again on the back burner. We realized that in order to say ‘yes’ to our relationship we had to say ‘no’ to some other things.

Being Intentional
Paul: Since I am a task oriented person, it’s easy for me to put projects before people. I get focused on accomplishing my to-do list and sometimes forget that there are people (with feelings) involved. One way I strive to keep our work – life balance in check is by setting limited times for things like answering email and doing extra work from home. I’m also intentional about making my relationship with Stephanie a priority by having regular date nights, asking for forgiveness when there is a hurt between us, and making time each day for us to talk.


Re-Evaluation
Even when we are intentional and say ‘no’ to extra stuff, the busyness seems to creep in unsuspectingly over time. Without realizing it, we still manage to get ourselves back on the busy train and things get out of whack. The tool we use to set this right is re-evaluation. We use a calendar reminder every three months to discuss this question: How are we spending our time and what adjustments do we need to make? Having that regular gut check helps keep us focused on what’s most important – us. When necessary, we make a list of what we’re going to let go of in order to keep our relationship a priority.

What is your secret to a healthy work – life balance? Please share in the comments below.




Comments

  1. UnknownMarch 2, 2020 at 7:05 AM

    When we notice a long stretch of evening commitments on our calendar, we write "SCHEDULE NOTHING" on an evening before and after the busy time. We're sure to spend that time alone relaxing and connecting.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Paul FrancoisMarch 2, 2020 at 4:23 PM

      Great idea - thank you for sharing! We do something similar by writing "FAMILY DAY" on the calendar and we're not allowed to allow anything else to creep in on those days.

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Great Sex!

By
Sex between a married couple is not only good, it’s very good. If you read the research and surveys, you will find that married couples experience better and more frequent sex than non-married couples. Married couples are healthier, happier, and live longer. When we went on a WorldWide Marriage Encounter weekend, we were more than a little surprised when a priest told us that our love-making is good, is important for us, and is important to the world. He encouraged us to “make mad passionate love!”
    So, why has married sex become something else? Society and media portray sex for married couples as dull and lifeless, a tool used to manipulate, something to joke about, and something that - beyond the newlywed phase- gradually drifts away. We’ve been sold this bill of goods, and we often buy into it! What we really crave in our sex life is to give and receive something powerful- to experience the depths of our passion and love for each other, to be as intimate as possible. Our freq…
1 comment
Read more

Advice From a Divorce Lawyer

By
Yes, this is a strange twist.  We recently heard about James J Sexton's book, "If You're in My Office, It's Already Too Late."  James is a divorce attorney from New York, who started noticing some patterns after 20 years of working with couples whose marriages were ending.
Post a Comment
Read more

Marriage Manners Matter

By
"Fine!" and "Whatever!" These 2 powerful words have the incredible potential to bring nearly any discussion to a screeching halt.  They send the insensitive message of "I don't care. Discussion over.  Period. Full stop!"   As married couples, we have probably used these or similar words.  And, if we have raised children we have probably employed time out, taken the car keys or other forms of discipline.

Those 2 little words are not  the focus of this blog.
5 comments
Read more

Sex on Days Ending in 'Y'

By
Lovemaking is one of the most important aspects of a healthy marriage.  Yet there are so many impediments and inhibitions to making love once those wonderful Honeymoon years are over.
Post a Comment
Read more

Tone of Voice

By
Something that we’ve become increasingly aware of in our marriage is how our tone of voice so significantly affects our communication – for better or for worse! It is remarkable how something so seemingly small can make such a huge impact on whether our communication is healthy, productive, and enriching or debilitating, disheartening, and provocative. Believe it or not, tone of voice is huge. WE would go as far as to say tone of voice is at the root of most of the small hurts we experience in our relationship.
Perhaps it would be easier to make our case using an example. Recently, we were trying to get out of the house to go to church and be on time. I (Stephanie) have to admit I am typically the one who is running behind trying to get one last thing put away or rushing because I did not plan my time well. Paul will often playfully turn the hall light on and off letting me know he is by the door ready and waiting. Usually I will laugh it off and tell him I am coming. This particular…
Post a Comment
Read more