1) Learn her “Love Language:" And speak it often! (Learn more: What Language Are You Speaking? )
Janine’s love language is “Acts of Service.” So, when I vacuum or do dishes or cook, it fills up her ‘love tank' - her mood brightens and there’s a whole different vibe between us. I can tell I’ve found a direct path to her heart.
2) Surprise Her: Flowers for no reason, a lunch date, or a mid-day text or phone call are simple things that may sound cliché, but women almost universally respond positively to them. Letting your wife know you’re thinking about “her” stokes the fire of romance.
3) Tune in and listen: One of the things that first attracted me to Ken was that he was such a great listener. When he makes the effort to ‘tune in’ and help me sort out whatever is on my mind, my heart melts like butter.
4) Hold her hand: Although holding hands now isn’t quite as electrifying as it was when we were dating, I still love the feel of Ken's hand in mine. It surprises me how calming and reassuring it can be to simply hold hands.
5) Compliments and Appreciation: This one is big for me (Janine). When Ken thanks me, or just acknowledges something I’ve done (cleaned the bathroom, tried a new recipe) it’s like sunshine for my soul.
6) Give her a break: When our kids were little, the cleaning and parenting was draining and constant. Giving Janine a ½ hour of quiet time (to go for a walk or take a bubble bath) was better than any expensive gift.
7) It’s the little things: Bring her coffee, rub her neck, touch her as you walk by, wink. Each morning when I bring Janine her coffee, she smiles and says, “Thank You!” Seems like a small thing, but it’s a tangible way of expressing my love. (Read more here: "I will Romance you every day")
8) Let her set the pace on sex: I need to let Janine know it’s HER I want, not just sex. When I changed my focus to pleasing her and tuning in to her cues, it was a turning point for our passion.
*Stay tuned for our future article: What your Husband Wants. (It’s a shorter list 😉)