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The Infamous But
Eliminating the word 'but' during times of tension and replacing it with a thoughtful 'and' changes the tone of the conversation to one of inclusion.
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Marriage, Inc.
Before we got married, we thought we were a normal couple. We spoke about our values. We shared our expectations. We went to the required premarital class. But none of that prepared us to have an argument over a glass, a sink, a sock… If you think about it, marriage is less like a fairy tale and more like launching a company. Research says that starting a company is one of the hardest things to do. What they don’t tell you is that getting married is basically the same thing. But for this start-up, your co-founder sleeps in your bed, eats your snacks, and takes feedback very personally. Both parties…
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Making Home a Safe Place
When our kids were very young, we had the good fortune of getting to know a couple with teens and adult children. Steve and Barb were a delight to be around, and one of the things that struck us the most about them was the way their love seemed to inspire a welcoming atmosphere in their home. We’d be sitting with them chatting, and see teenagers wandering through, laughing, and raiding the pantry for snacks. Barb would point out – oh, that one is ours, and those other two are friends. Talking about it later, we decided we wanted our home to be like Steve and Barb’s, a safe place…
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For Richer or Poorer
Matt So those of you who have seen our past two posts have noticed that we have focused on the part of a traditional wedding vow where a couple promises to love each other “in sickness and in health.” As we reflected on that promise and all the promises that we made on our wedding day, we were struck by the awesome wisdom of whoever authored those words so if you’ll indulge us, we’d like to explore another one of those wedding day promises – “for richer or poorer.” Gail “For richer or poorer”? I am not sure even to this day we actually understand what “richer” means, but oh…
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Prioritizing US
Julie: Grandkids, family activities, visiting sick relatives and friends, volunteer work, visiting our kids, jobs, the house, the bills – life has a million distractions. It’s so easy to let our lenses of love get out of focus and prioritize these other things over our sexual relationship. Our sexual flame flickers as we behave more like roommates than lovers.
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“Just Do It!”
Quit thinking about doing something for your marriage- Just Do It!
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FlatTire #2
Summers can be crazy and wonderful. Then you get Flat Tire #2. Summers are a wonderful time to reconnect with family and friends, enjoy longer days and leaisure time at the lake or cabin. Ours got crazy with a backed up septic system at the cabin and then Flat Tire #2.
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Yelping my Spouse-Round Two
We have plenty of reviewable materials between the two of us that we can Yelp so when we were asked to write another Yelp Review, we jumped at the chance. Here is our Yelp Review-Round Two. The ‘Quick Target Run Rating: ⭐ (1/5 Stars) Review Title: “It’s a Trap” Review by Chris: Management pitched the trip to me as, “I need to get some hand sanitizer and tissues. Five minutes, tops!”. We walked through the doors of Target at 2:15 p.m. By 3:05 p.m., we were looking at the seasonal décor. Our cart had two summer themed throw pillows and a watermelon scented candle. We had also acquired a 24 pack of “vibrant summer” felt tipped pens…
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Finding Peace
Working our way through an unusually busy week last week, we finally reached an evening where we managed a little date out together to regroup. When we are having chaotic or taxing times, it’s always good to seek out a little bit of peace.
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In Sickness and In Health – Part 2
Matt When we left off in our last blog, we were looking at our changing roles when one or the other of us may get sick….As our journey continues, we will continue to look at the changing dynamics of our relationship. Gail At the beginning of the summer Matt had open heart surgery. Talk about a lifestyle and relationship change. With lots of love, understanding and prayer Matt (and I) made it through. After a few sessions of Cardiac rehab Matt came home all excited “I graduated to being able to lift up to 25Lbs!” We celebrated and gave thanks for Matt’s continued healing. Which brings us to our first…
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