Making up is Hard to Do
Every married couple has conflicts- sometimes over the littlest things. Most conflicts are a result of our unmet expectations- I expected this, but instead that happened. We begin to feel hurt or disappointed. We begin to think we're disrespected or that we’re unloved. In the first 5 years of our marriage, the silent treatment was our ‘go-to’ strategy. We brushed our problems under the rug and hoped they would go away. It’s taken us years to figure out that NOT talking about those little disappointments was NOT a good strategy. Eventually, we learned to deal with the small irritations as they happen, rather than letting them build up until there’s a big eruption. One Friday evening, one of us made plans to get together with friends, not knowing the other one of us had been hoping for a quiet movie night at home. When we told each other of our plans a disagreement broke out- the walls went up, and there was that proverbial silence that you could have cut with …
Every married couple has conflicts- sometimes over the littlest things. Most conflicts are a result of our unmet expectations- I expected this, but instead that happened. We begin to feel hurt or disappointed. We begin to think we're disrespected or that we’re unloved. In the first 5 years of our marriage, the silent treatment was our ‘go-to’ strategy. We brushed our problems under the rug and hoped they would go away. It’s taken us years to figure out that NOT talking about those little disappointments was NOT a good strategy. Eventually, we learned to deal with the small irritations as they happen, rather than letting them build up until there’s a big eruption. One Friday evening, one of us made plans to get together with friends, not knowing the other one of us had been hoping for a quiet movie night at home. When we told each other of our plans a disagreement broke out- the walls went up, and there was that proverbial silence that you could have cut with …