Party Pitfalls

P: Have you ever noticed at parties that couples tend to separate into groups where the men congregate in one place and the women in another? We recently went on a double date night with some friends and even though we all shared a table, us guys made conversation with each other while the gals engaged in their own conversation. Driving home we realized that even though we spent the evening together, we had engaged with each other very little. What kind of date night is that?

S: Since that evening, we recommitted to the value of being together as a couple. We figured that the Thanksgiving holiday would be a very good time to put this value into practice. Upon arriving at our family gathering, instead of heading straight to the kitchen to find the women, Paul and I greeted our hosts and said our hellos together. Even though I checked occasionally to see if any help was needed, it wasn’t long before I sought out Paul again.

P: And instead of watching football with the guys, I found another couple whom I hadn’t previously met and invited Stephanie to join me as we shared about our families and the joys and struggles of married life. It was so much easier getting to know this new couple with Stephanie beside me sharing her input and charm.

S: Even though the standard gender divide was happening around us, we found each other and stuck together. As we did this we noticed that several other couples also seemed to find their way back to each other and the room was filled with more lively conversation. This holiday season, we invite you to give this simple attitude shift a test run. You might just find you enjoy hanging out with your spouse!

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5 Things Men Want

1. RESPECT: (KEN) : When a man is asked, 'Would you rather be respected or loved?' most would choose being respected. In his book Love and Respect , Dr. E. Eggerichs explains this tendency. (JANINE) : For years, I didn't appreciate how important it was to Ken that I treat him with respect. I also didn't understand how hurtful it was when I dis respected him. When I show Ken respect ( by affirming his decisions, avoiding sarcasm or by not using a demeaning tone) it translates (for him) into feeling 'loved.' Another way to say this is: when a man is dis respected, he receives the message he is NOT loved. 2. SEX:

What Can’t You Afford to Edit out of Your Story?

Michelle: When I was a teenager, I remember coming home after breaking up with a guy and my dad asking me how it went. I gave the inevitable teenage response, “I don’t want to talk about it.” My dad responded, “You don’t have to. But you do need to remember that there are some things in life that you can’t afford to edit out of your story. Is this one of them?”

The 5 "P's" of Constructive Feedback

Photo Credit: Ian Schneider (Reprise of post originally published on 09-16-2019) We once read an article on criticism in marriage. The Author's bottom line was "don't do it." Even asking: "Can I give you some feedback?" was cautioned against. Sometimes suggestions given with the best intent with regard to work, chores, relationships with the kids can back fire. Think back seat driving. Experience has taught us 5 Key Points for when we just want to give each other a little suggestion. These 5 simple points set the tone and enable us to let down our defenses and be supportive of each other when offering a little constructive feedback.

Remember When...

It's easy to get lost in our day-to-day. Once we're out of the honeymoon phase of marriage and real life settles in, we develop routines and patterns of behavior. We become consumed by the here and now, and sometimes we can lose sight of the excitement and passion that brought us together and inspired us to get married in the first place.

The Healing Power of Touch

Our last blog explored a super power we all have within us – the Super Power of Affirmation. But did you know that you possess another Super Power? It’s the Healing Power of Touch. Holy Hole in a Doughnut, Batman! Bet you didn’t know you had all that in you!

Easter Greetings!

Dear Readers, As Spring unfolds and we continue to recover from this pandemic, there could not be a more wonderful time to nurture relationship growth. Wishing you a Happy Easter and a Springtime of Promise. From all of us at TheCouplesPost

When All Else Fails . . . Eat Ice Cream

For many of us the COVID honeymoon is long over. Isolation, loss of routines, access to the gym, financial worries, working from home and changing school schedules has had us stretched too thin too long. We'd rather eat an entire loaf of bread than bake one and if we hear how much someone enjoys the extra time with their kids we'll scream! This is COVID Stress. We've all experienced it.

10 Things Women Want

1) Learn her “Love Language :" And speak it often! (Learn more: What Language Are You Speaking? ) Janine’s love language is “Acts of Service.” So, when I vacuum or do dishes or cook, it fills up her ‘love tank' - her mood brightens and there’s a whole different vibe between us. I can tell I’ve found a direct path to her heart.

8 Misunderstandings That Are Hurting Your Sex Life

Why are we writing about sex again? Sex in marriage is more important than most people think. It's mysterious. There are a lot of "layers" and complexities to this whole topic.... read on...

Getting More of What You Want in Your Marriage

Recently, we attended a work-shop on how to incorporate more positivity into our lives. We were reminded how easily the challenges of life can dominate our thinking. This can be especially true where our couple relationship is concerned. Have you ever thought, “He never gives me any affection” or “She always nags me”?

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