It’s that time of year – you know, when our kids are all on their best behavior and the most frequent threat you hear parents utter is “Santa is watching!” The latest craze is the Elf on the Shelf. The elf moves around your home, keeping its eye on your kids and causing a little mayhem along the way. Maybe your elf plays a game with a few of the stuffed animals in the house. Perhaps it gets into your cookie jar. Maybe it even spills flour in your kitchen. No matter what, the kids know it’s watching them.
So, what if the elf was watching you and your spouse? Would he tell Santa to bring you a present or put a lump of coal in your stocking?
Nick: There is no doubt that Jen is the concierge of Christmas for our family. I may hang the lights on the house and on the tree, but Jen makes most of the magic happen. I think if the elf was watching me, he’d remind me that all the preparation can be stressful. If he caught me trying to avoid the whirlwind, he’d tell me I should jump in and look for ways to help instead. My elf would say, “if you want any presents from Santa, you really need to be present to Jen all season long.” He’d also say, “it would be best to bring a glass of wine and rub her feet as much as she needs it to make it through to Christmas.”
Jen: A friend once said to me “Husbands have it easy. It must be nice for Christmas to just HAPPEN.” I used to take a lot of the holiday preparation on myself. I think my elf would have asked me how much of that was me doing it all because I thought I had to. A few years ago, I was running around crazy in mid-December trying to check off all the lists on my own. Nick asked me one evening what he could do to help and it occurred to me that making Christmas magical is just as important to him as it is to me. We went shopping together that night, and it ended up becoming a date-night for us. I think my elf would tell me if I want any presents from Santa, I need to include Nick in the preparations, because when he is more a part of the shopping and preparing, he is also more appreciative of the joy of Christmas, too.Keeping our roles in the season separate can steal away all of the magic if we’re not careful. It’s better to back each other up and work as a team. You may discover there are hidden opportunities to make some magic in your relationship as well. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from The Couples’ Post!